Tuesday, August 10, 2010
be something
i want my life to have meaning, however cliche that sounds. i don't necessarily have to be remembered for eternity (though that would be cool..) but i want to do something that impacts others. I only have one life to live, and i don't want to waste it. I know its not too late or anything, i mean i am 18, but i feel like i haven't really done anything yet. i've done small time charity work. i want to directly change the lives of others. I don't just want to send money, and i don't want to be all talk and no game. i need to figure out what i am passionate about, and how i can actually make a difference. i want a life worth living. my mission: figure out what i can d to leave a footprint.
Sunday, August 8, 2010
the end is scary. breathe in and out, in and out.
This is my first blog post ever, and it is a bit odd.. i will give it my best.
It feels so weird. The summer is almost over, and everything i have ever known will be changing. My friends will all be scattered across the country. No more late movie nights at Emily's house, or chinese take-out at mine. No more all trying to fit on one twin sized bed, and no more kristen's mom catching sarah and ross in the closet. No more spending the day tanning at the pool with the people i love. No more puzzles with elena and no more farkle with nick. No more shopping with mother or hiking with dad. No more being dependent of my parents, my family, or my friends. It will be the first time im ever alone in a new place. I'll be honest, i am scared. I know millions of kids go off to college every year, and millions of adults graduate. But am i really becoming one of them? They seem to be so much older then i am, so much more educated and learned in the ways of the world. i can't even fathom how i will survive.
Time is so daunting. in just 8 days, one of my best friends may be leaving my life forever. then in 9, the next, and in 10 the next, and finally, in 11 days, i will be sitting here in my house alone. Well, until of course i leave an entire week later. And my sister is leaving early before me as well. I fear i will miss her the most.
And yes, i know. There are so many ways to communicate now with phone calls and texts and skype and facebook. But its not the same as seeing somebody every day. I am scared we will all come back for thanksgiving break different.
The future is so uncertain, i don't want to just jump in head first, eyes closed. Upon saying that, i am incredibly excited for college and all the nuances that come with it. i just feel like im going at it alone, and that scares me.
breathe in and out, in and out, slowly.. 2 weeks will be here before i know it and i want to cherish every minute.
It feels so weird. The summer is almost over, and everything i have ever known will be changing. My friends will all be scattered across the country. No more late movie nights at Emily's house, or chinese take-out at mine. No more all trying to fit on one twin sized bed, and no more kristen's mom catching sarah and ross in the closet. No more spending the day tanning at the pool with the people i love. No more puzzles with elena and no more farkle with nick. No more shopping with mother or hiking with dad. No more being dependent of my parents, my family, or my friends. It will be the first time im ever alone in a new place. I'll be honest, i am scared. I know millions of kids go off to college every year, and millions of adults graduate. But am i really becoming one of them? They seem to be so much older then i am, so much more educated and learned in the ways of the world. i can't even fathom how i will survive.
Time is so daunting. in just 8 days, one of my best friends may be leaving my life forever. then in 9, the next, and in 10 the next, and finally, in 11 days, i will be sitting here in my house alone. Well, until of course i leave an entire week later. And my sister is leaving early before me as well. I fear i will miss her the most.
And yes, i know. There are so many ways to communicate now with phone calls and texts and skype and facebook. But its not the same as seeing somebody every day. I am scared we will all come back for thanksgiving break different.
The future is so uncertain, i don't want to just jump in head first, eyes closed. Upon saying that, i am incredibly excited for college and all the nuances that come with it. i just feel like im going at it alone, and that scares me.
breathe in and out, in and out, slowly.. 2 weeks will be here before i know it and i want to cherish every minute.
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